Personality Test

^{some test i took linked from tin.}
bold= on point
italic= interesting
no special= eh, watever

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

working backwards to remember

^dream

apparently i was in ROTC (college)/military and my CO was announcing everyone's assignments. i spotted to what i think was my "gf/partner" or really close female friend and she made a motion in her face to tell me to smile and cheer up.

"i don't want to leave. im scared to leave, i just want to stay."

then when my CO announced my name, I shouted right here and i woke up saying right here.

i was in an airport type of place. i remember i forgot my cellphone before the duty assignments so i went to the second level on some broken escalator and next to my cell phone was a Motorola two way pager and it had an incoming page.

thats all i can remember

5 Things You Shouldn't Do During Finals Week

^{(from first hand exp.)}

1. Take Benadryl and [try to] counter it with Caffeine.
2. Work ~40 hours between 2 jobs.
3. Refreshing Facebook & Twitter for new updates
4. Write papers without editing them @ all.
5. Show up at the classroom 20 mins earlier than the one student is cool with the Professor.
   

December, We Meet

2nd week of December and I'm feeling exactly how I expected to be.

I projected to feel like crap, lazy, uninspired, and troubled under the surface. There isn't anything new that's running around internally, fucking shit up. Just the same issues I endure during the Autumn/Winter months. It just sucks, that I just don't give a fuck about anything academically, but when it comes to creativity I'm more willing to care.

Maybe its just senioritis + SAD + 40 hr work weeks cuz this is how I feel:

out of focus and unadjusted overexposed.

til the next time
erwin

Dear Anonymous Youth,

Over the last months or so I've realized and noted that I've been real cold and become so much of an ass. I know part of it has to do with my personality nowadays with a lot of internals and lessons learned from life experiences, but I do appreciate your honesty in calling me out. I realized there are genuine qualities I used to have that I and some folks around me miss. Read: Sincerity. I think today made me realize how far I've come since the beginning of high school up until now & how much I grew up.

All in all today made me realize why I do the work that I do as a community&cultural worker. And I think what we forgot to mention in KAMP's lesson plan is that we continually refer to the "tree" metaphors such as, knowing your roots, family branches, kuya/ate/ading trees. But to continually empower your generation, some of us folks are gonna move on from the community to do bigger things and pursue our own dreams, so in the end some of y'all need to pick up where we left off.

Someone once told me @ SFSU, "We stand on their shoulders." Folks who have done community work have laid it out and are the trunks of our community so its up to y'all to pass the knowledge and experiences as branches standing on their shoulders.

But I digress, today made me reaffirm my existence as a community&cultural worker. It put an end to my constant questioning of 'why do I do the work that I do?' And some internal issues with my personality that deal with the pain that comes with tapping into my empathy & sincerity.

I wholeheartedly thank you for everything
Erwin M.

Ridiculously Bored

I don't do these often but I seriously have to do it. -- I'm Bored out of my fucking mind.

Its late/early and I think I already slept off the Turkey and the Benadryl. So its the middle of the night and the things I do enjoy usually in the middle of the night I'm not in to. Its Black Friday and seriously there's nothing out there to copp or @ least I'm not really willing to drop $$$ for it.

just a quickie
win

Buy My Mixtape

In order for me to write my TFM530 research paper I need to first write out some thoughts that are present within the gray matter.

Most slept on mixtape this year, TiRon - Ketchup. TiRon is another LA rapper/producer who rolls around with more known and received, Pacific Division. So if anything, dude sounds like the 4th (unofficial) member of Pac Div. Talks about simliar things that occur in Mibbs, Like, and BeYoung's lyrics like clothes, kicks, women, LA life, 20something struggles. He drops a bar on Paper with Pac Div and on his mixtape Mibbs makes an appearance on his song, "Yeah, You Crazy" talking about crazy women in their lives. Eventhough all the hype has centered around 3-4 artists when it comes to their mixtapes in 2009 (Drake, Wale, Pac Div, J.cole), I really have to say TiRon was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay under everyone's radar and I was late on this shit, because I didn't know this shit dropped in February. What really tuned me into him was his video for "Throwin My Money" which directly relates to my style feen. Download Here.



k? sic, late

til the next time
erwin